Problems with dating divorced men
I understand the consequences of this firsthand as a woman who became the ‘rebound relationship’ several times in a row with several divorced men who assured me they were READY for a relationship then they fled for the hills after about 3-6 months as our relationship started to become more serious on an emotional level.
I have learned the hard way that it’s critical when dating divorced men to find out up front how from the divorced man you are meeting for coffee just exactly how long his divorce has been finalized before deciding whether to continue to see him (one year or more is best).
Is it just a few suitcases plus a carry-on or is it really more like 55 Steamer Trunks? If you aren’t moving up on his list of priorities as your relationship progresses, will your resentment and anger come into play and start eating away at the edges?
How much does your divorced man truly value the amazing qualities you willingly share with him?
Take time to figure out whether the input you are giving is exceeding his output.
Although no relationship is an equal balance of give and take, you should feel confident that the time and energy you are investing right now will be worth it over the long run.
I have many single girlfriends who share this choice and many who chose marriage, had children and got divorced.
I have giggled to myself and so very much appreciated the little things that divorced men I have dated have done for me.When I first started dating after my divorce was completely final, I was so very hopeful that I would have a transformational romance like the ones I watched on Lifetime.The right romance would include a ‘chance’ meeting where I desperately needed help with a flat tire, met just the man I was destined to be with long-term and then suddenly found myself bonding with him in an ice-skating rink with hot chocolate and anticipating jewelry gifts under our Christmas tree.It’s also helpful to find out exactly what the divorced man has done in terms of self-growth and what he has learned and changed from his previous patterns of behavior.Divorced Men Come with Baggage that does not Begin to Fit in the overhead Bin.
Whether repairing the kitchen table or planning a romantic evening, the male ego and inner child have a strong need and desire to get it right and succeed.